Blending a Family.. Puree style

Excuse me while I have and " Ugly soup " kind of moment.. if you need someone to chime in with you on your blended family woes .. this is your moment. ( oh.. and a dose of encouragement)

You know that button on the blender.. the one that says "Puree".. the one that turns everything into ugly soup.. yea.. that's what it has sometimes felt like over the years of being the "Mom"/"wife" in our "blended" family. As a Christian and follower of Christ it can be all the messier to try to navigate through. To be honest.... there are a host of sins that do often lead straight to this haphazard road. But not always. And.. To be honest there is a lot of supernatural love that can be gained and experienced through the trials by fire that come specifically from this type of family unit.

Our family was two broken units.. that came crashing together in a most untimely and conspicuous kind of way.

My husband was a long time Pastor in a relatively small community for many years prior to our relationship. He was much loved and respected and even adored by many for he had risen above the hardship of having a completely disable wife and raising their 4 children and yet maintained his church and his job.. and continued to be the idle of the community in many ways.

My story is the wife of a military soldier being stationed in that same city bringing our two young children with us and discovering my husband was really a monster who was abusing my daughter in the night and when I was away.

Everything about our blending was a complete and total public affair..

Can you imagine the mess this was when it was placed in the proverbial blender...

What were we ( the parents of all of these precious children) thinking? .. well .. we weren't ...we were surviving.. we were afraid... we were.. alone.. broken.. unhinged and barely holding on to anything in life let alone stability of any kind.. literally everything was upside down and inside out... and then..we added our own sin ( we began our relationship before my divorce was final and my husband was divorcing his first wife and taking legal "Gaurdianship" of her in order to maintain his promise of providing for her as she had been in a nursing home for over a year at that point) to the batch and tossed it all into a blender. Yes.. take a minute to digest that and feel free to ask me all the questions.. I am an open book.

If you were keeping count.. between these two families there were 6 children.. 6 human beings that were still coming up in life .. learning who they were in Christ.. learning how the world views them.. learning who they were in their families. For each one of them.. that line of security .. was fragmented.. permanently.. unarguably.. and the burden was heavier than the average on both sides,

der.

I share all of this.. because our story.. although unique in it's own telling.. shares some common threads with all blended families... it comes from tragedy.. it comes out of hardship... it can come out of sin...it has consequences ..and it can be good in the end.

God doesn't like sin.. any sin.. but he is not just a judge.. He is also our Savior .. and He makes all things good for those that love Him.. All .. but just because He can make it good .. doesn't mean it will be easy.

I can say today that as I am having an "Ugly soup" kind of moment. You know.. where I am hanging my head because of the challenges and feeling like some things are just too broken to fix.. that if I reflect on the big picture I see the good and beautiful work God has done. This brokenness.. in me.. this deep hurt that I sometimes feel brings me back to God like lighting speed.. I am humbled when I realize what we have come through. Knowing that it is only by His mercy we have created a family out of so many jagged pieces. I guess our family is more like broken stained glass then a beautiful painting. but I am going to keep admiring the light that breaks through the lines.. even if it is bent and and at times subdued. It's the glass that changes.. but the source of the light is always the same.. and it always prevails. So.. if your family is a bit like broken stained glass.. and you're having an Ugly Soup kind of moment.. turn to the light.. and let it in.. soak it in deep .. let God get close to all the ugly there is.. because He knows it all the way through.. Give it up to Him and take a deep breath... Don't try to be worthy.. or sinless.. because you can't.. you aren't and you never will be.. and that's the beauty of the brokenness .. He loves you as you are.. Ugly soup and all.

#Weekend #Fun #Saturday